Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Baptizing a Drunk:

A man is stumbling through the woods, totally drunk, when he comes upon a

preacher baptizing people in the river. He proceeds to walk into the

water and subsequently bumps into the preacher. The preacher turns around

and is almost overcome by the smell of alcohol, whereupon he asks the drunk,

'Are you ready to find Jesus?'

The drunk answers, 'Yes, I am.'

So the preacher grabs him and dunks him in the water. He pulls him up and
asks the drunk,

'Brother have you found Jesus?'

The drunk replies, 'No, I haven't found Jesus.'

The preacher shocked at the answer, dunks him into the water again for a

little longer. He again pulls him out of the water and asks again, 'Have you

found Jesus my brother?'

The drunk again answers, 'No, I haven't found Jesus.'

By this time the preacher is at his wits end and dunks the drunk in the

water again -- - but this time holds him down or about 30 seconds and when

he begins kicking his arms and legs he pulls him up. The preacher again asks

the drunk, 'For the love of God have you found Jesus?'

The drunk wipes his eyes and catches his breath and says to the preacher,

'Hey Man, Are you sure this is where he fell in?'


HermitJim said...

Hey...I think I was at that meeting! Seriously, some of the camp meetings we went to when I was a kid did baptise in whatever was available, like creeks or ponds.

I haven't heard this one, though...pretty funny!

js said...

Thanks for the comment Jim! As I said, I read that one over three times and could not stop laughing!


serenitytalk said...

That is a funny one. The priest at our church used to tell jokes at the end of every sermon and this was one of them. Everyone loved it.


js said...

That's a priest with a good sense of humor. Not a fundamentalist type am sure.

Thanks Lydia.


Lydia said...

Yes, he has a great sense of humor. Mumbles his way through mass, but loved to joke.

Everyone's favorite part of going to church was to hear his joke at the end, until...there was a blonde joke then a blonde complained and that was the end of jokes. Now his sermon is just plain boring.


js said...

That's so sad. So much for Christian Forgiveness and following in the footsteps of Christ.

oh well.