Baptizing a Drunk:

A man is stumbling through the woods, totally drunk, when he comes upon a

preacher baptizing people in the river. He proceeds to walk into the

water and subsequently bumps into the preacher. The preacher turns around

and is almost overcome by the smell of alcohol, whereupon he asks the drunk,

'Are you ready to find Jesus?'


The drunk answers, 'Yes, I am.'


So the preacher grabs him and dunks him in the water. He pulls him up and
asks the drunk,


'Brother have you found Jesus?'


The drunk replies, 'No, I haven't found Jesus.'


The preacher shocked at the answer, dunks him into the water again for a

little longer. He again pulls him out of the water and asks again, 'Have you

found Jesus my brother?'


The drunk again answers, 'No, I haven't found Jesus.'


By this time the preacher is at his wits end and dunks the drunk in the

water again -- - but this time holds him down or about 30 seconds and when

he begins kicking his arms and legs he pulls him up. The preacher again asks

the drunk, 'For the love of God have you found Jesus?'


The drunk wipes his eyes and catches his breath and says to the preacher,

'Hey Man, Are you sure this is where he fell in?'